I was sitting in the eye doctor’s chair. Only moments earlier I had been traumatized by that stupid glaucoma test where they shoot a puff of air in your eye. Well, they try anyway, because with me it’s more like testing the resistance of the surface of my eyelid. On the upside, apparently, my reflexes are still faster than a puff of air.

Anyway, the doctor examining my eyes, knowing I run an advertising agency, asked, “Michael, what can I do to improve customer service?”

I asked, “When your employees need to have their eyes examined or their glasses adjusted, you sort of fit them in somewhere during the day don’t you,”

“Well, sure,” she replied. “We just fit them in where we can. Just makes it easier. It’s an employee benefit.”

“Well,” I began, “If you really want to improve customer service, make your employees make an appointment like everyone else. Make them figure out how to get time off work to come in because you don’t have “after hours” appointments. Make them sit in your uncomfortable chairs that only serve to emphasize the fact that their appointment was supposed to have been 15 minutes ago. Let them listen to music they hate that is playing too loud. Make them look at magazines that are 9 months old. And let them sit in the waiting room and see how your receptionist, who has the personality of a tree stump, makes everyone who approaches her feel as though they are a huge interruption. At that point your employees may begin to develop some effective ideas on how to improve your customer service.”

She just stood there staring at me. I soon found out, in addition to the fact that the receptionist was her niece, that in her silence, she was merely calculating how much my critique of her business was going to cost me.

The money part doesn’t bother me nearly as much as the fact that she says I now need to come in weekly for a glaucoma test. The worst part? On my way out, I overheard her telling one of the tech’s, “We need to train the receptionist to run the “air gun” for Mr. Crooks’ weekly visits.”

Two lessons. First, being brutally forthright with clients, customers and prospects isn’t always the best way to go. A little “sugar-coating” goes a long way. Second, if you’re a business owner, don’t ask questions to which you don’t really want an honest answer.