Goals have a special place in the solo psyche. They have helped plenty of soloists to focus energies, challenge themselves and nurture a sense of achievement. But used unwisely they can, quite unintendedly, be counterproductive. That’s because goals are typically treated in a linear fashion: the theory goes you start at a point and progress along a line to a desired outcome.
The problem with this is a journey towards a goal isn’t usually linear. More typically, we lurch towards and away from our goals, not necessarily making discernible progress over time. Lots of dieters illustrate the failures of the linear model. They start off with kilos to lose and aim for their target weight. They have good days, then bad, then good…and their goal often remains over there, in the future somewhere. Even those with a passing interest in health know overweight people are better off ditching the diets and resolving instead to adopt an overall healthier lifestyle.
When you focus on the journey (healthier lifestyle) not the destination (lost weight), your desired outcome can still be attained, but incidentally. The odd dodgy day doesn’t matter, provided you enjoy overall benefits on an ongoing basis. This week, try taking a goal of yours out of the abstract by asking “What can I do today that will attract my desired outcome towards me?” It’s far more rewarding to try and honour the process like this, than it is to be an “I’ll be happy when…” type.